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A Huge Big Thank you to Bill Sands who has made the following summeries availabe to me.

They were previously on his site.

Bill Sands -

Dionne's Ditherings 16/19 March 1999.

A lot to report this week, so let's get cracking.


Andy has returned to the Sugdens, but he's still worried that Sarah and
Jack won't want him. Sarah tries to get him to talk, but he's not having
any of it. Meantime, Donna tries to gauge Viv's reaction to his return,
but all she can do is spit about how she's going to get rid of Andy.

The social worker visits the Sugdens, as she's worried that he may need
to go somehwre else. Andy blurts out that he wants to stay with Jack &
Sarah, which impresses her so much that she agrees that he can be
adopted. Paperwork isn't one of her strong points, because she hasn't
completed one form since she started her visits!

Overcome with joy, the Sugdens go to the Diner to celebrate. Viv is so
disgusted by the news that she storms over there for her weekly
confrontation with Sarah. Donna follows her in a panic and blurts out
that she knew that Billy was in the village. This shocks Viv so much
that the storyline is forgotten by yesterday's episode.

Balsa Boy & Miss Piggy

Yes, this storyline drags on, and on, and on..... while Kelly stalls Roy
on his proposal, suggesting that they wait a year and seeing how it
goes, Scott tries it on with Dopey. She scores an afternoon off and
trots round. They go upstairs, but again Balsa can't get it on.

Having humiliated Dopey and taunted Roy, Balsa goes to see Miss Piggy.
He bets her 100 pounds that she won't be with Roy at the end.

Scott (to Dopey): There's nothing wrong with me. Maybe it's you - maybe
I don't fancy you any more.

(Acting Watch - with decent actors, this would have been quite an
affecting little scene. As it was, it was crap. Baring a chest and
biting a lip are *not* the hallmarks of good acting).

Meantime, Viv decides to bond with her family, and organises a
surprise.... to the local funfair. What originality. Anyway, the family
dress up for the occasion - Viv in her usual fluffy nonsense, Donna with
an ill advised hairdo, Kelly in the lowest V-necked top ever made and
Scott attempting to act, but shedding splinters all over the place. Once
there, Viv reminisces about how much they used to love the twister, and
suggests that Scott & Kelly relive old times. Little does she know...
Scott suffers from wandering hands syndrome during the ride, and it
takes all of Kelly's powers to hesve him off her before Roy catches them
(Roy's gone to the fair as well, proving once and for all that he has no

Back at the PO, Scott gives Roy his daily baiting, this time mentioning
that he knows more about Miss Piggy than Roy will ever know. Just then
Kelly walks in. Roy demands to know what Scott means by that remark.

Will Kelly spill the beans? Will she accept Roy's proposal? Will she
find a skirt longer than 2 inches?? It's too much for me!

The Dingles

Lisa is still angry at Zak for standing by while Ezra et al stole the
collection. She tells him that if he doesn't find the money, they are

Zak hits on another scam - he & Butch pose as tour guides and pass off
Home Farm as a stately home (Bostwick Manor) to a load of gullible (and
mute) Yanks. Their itinerary promises them a meeting with a genuine
"Lady of the Manor" - enter Mandy as Lady Amanda Bostwick. The Yanks are
impressed, and Zak recoups the money. He hands it to Lisa, who tells him
to give it personally to Ashley as an apology.

The Vets Ball & related stuff

It's a new week, so it's time for Zoe to act as PsychoVet.Having tried
to make amends with Jack and failing miserably, she seems unconcerned
that local farmers are taking their business elsewhere. Paddy is annoyed
at this, but is more preoccupied with finding a date for the Vets Ball.
He asks Tricia, who accepts readily. However, Bernice overhears this and
sees this as a chance to make her mark on the village. She develops a
staff rota, putting Tricia to work on that night and offering to
accompany Paddy instead.

Dopey is upset, and asks Alan to help. He speaks to Bernice, but she's
not playing ball. However, fate steps in....

Meantime, enter stage left Daniel Dean, a vet from rival firm Dean &
Marshall. A Hugh Grant wannabe with floppy hair, a "mobie" (it's a
mobile phone, not Ron Dixon's former empire) and a sports car, he
immediately makes himself at home by calling Jack Farmer Sugden and
slating Zoe in the process. Not much more to say on him, except he's
going to be one of those fops you used to read about in Biggles books.
In the Woolie, he tells Alan that he's going to the Vet's Ball on his
own. Good old Grandad - he arranges for Tricia to accompany Daniel.
Dopey is thrilled, unlike Mandy (who is seriously missing StudPaddy) and
Bernice (who sees her authority undermined).

In brief:

Biff & Kathy - both deny that they're attracted to each other, but
Marlon catches Biff mooning after her. Marlon resolves to set them up at
his birthday party next week.

Chris - having serious problems with Sean Reynolds, whose business is in
trouble and is trying to undercut Chris by stealing both his contracts
and his staff. Chris decides to play dirty by undercutting Reynolds
further, but Laura isn't convinced that's going to work.

Chris visits Reynolds to let him know he's got a fight on his hands.

Chris: Do you know how much I'm worth?

Reynolds: As a human being? Not much.

Hmm. The pair seem even so far. But the one thing guaranteed to get to
Chris is if Reynolds cracked on to either Laura or Kathy. Knowing how
weak Chris is when it comes to women, I'm sure Sean will try that tactic